Recently I sat and had a cup of tea with an elderly man. During our conversation he spoke of the loneliness of going into a house and wishing his dear wife was there so he could share things with. She has been many years dead. He spoke about the terrible thing it is for some elderly people whose family members do not take time for them. No family to visit you. As I sat and listened, I thought how sad, and how many more like him, sitting alone at night, glued to a TV, nothing special in particular to watch- just the sound of another human’s voice to pass the long lonely night away. How easy it is to forget the elderly- blank them- until they die and then STOP everything if we know them. TAKE TIME to go to their funeral. GIVE THEM FLOWERS- Though they know nothing of it. RECOUNT some fond memories or funny times together in passed time… and WALK AWAY feeling “better about ourselves.” We were there when it counted- we reassure ourselves and feel something of a self -righteousness vindicating us… We showed up for their funeral We MADE TIME -TOOK TIME- and SPENT TIME to do so! We have it so, so backwards. We neglect them in life and SHOW UP at their death an give flowers, accolades and they are not there to know of it. What took so long to TAKE TIME, MAKE TIME AND GIVE TIME?
For some logistics, geography, financial difficulties can be a reality. This dear elderly man told me how for many long years he would leave his family in the morning go to his widowed mom’s house get a fire lit for her and get her ready for the day. At night time, after he had spent a day working and time with his own young family, again he would return to her for an hour or so and speak with her and have a chat. This he did for years and years. He makes no profession of knowing Jesus Christ- yet his life testified of his value of another human being. True, there are many difficulties for some as mentioned above, but in this day and age with all the ability to communicate – email, text, call, visit- why should so many older family members, members of your community be so isolated and feel like this dear elderly man- how terrible to be alone?
“IF…”
“IF” life is about right relationships- and it is – LOVE GOD- LOVE OTHERS…shouldn’t we give ourselves to that which God values- those whom He Son died for. At times we don’t value the same things as God. Do you have a friend, family member- you are neglecting- too busy… the day will come when the word will come they have passed and then as society often does we tend to TAKE TIME- MAKE TIME – SPEND TIME around a coffin or a service.
“DAD, WHO ENCOURAGES THE ENCOURAGER?”
A few years ago, our youngest son Isaiah was about 9 years old at the time and we went to visit an elderly gentleman who was full of life and known as a “great encourager” of people in the things of Christ. We visited him at his home. He shared how hard night times were for him as he sat up and watched TV as long as he could before going to bed, as he so disliked going to bed as he missed his wife so much. She had passed away several years earlier. On the drive home, Isaiah had been thinking – about this man who had a reputation for being such an encourager. He broke the silence with a question, “Dad, who encourages the encourager…?” He had thought it through. This man was known for his love for people and seeking them out to encourage them yet he sat most nights by himself -alone! No one to encourage him. Cut off. It is easy to forget the encourager needs encouragement too…”out of the mouth of babes.” I have no doubt at his funeral , people will share of what an encouragement he was to so, so many, yet he himself sat so many nights alone, no one taking time to seek him out to encourage him…
BORED?
Consider these two elderly men and consider is there a family member of yours who is older and would like some company? Is there someone you know who is alone? There is a lovely verse which says, “God makes a home for the lonely” -{Psalm 68:6}. One translation puts it this way, “God sets the lonely in families..” {NIV} There is always someone you can reach out and TAKE TIME – MAKE TIME AND GIVE TIME to __________-{Put the person or persons name in here}. Some elderly people are housebound and no one to come and visit. I hear, some people who look for “ministries” looking over the horizon for “IT”-” the BIG one from God” to arrive and miss the people around them. We get too busy with things…and forget the souls of people.
Both elderly men have some things on common-they are in their later years DEATH is closer, they both know loneliness and the absence of loved ones. One does not have a personal relationship with the Lord Jesus, one does. Be a person a follower of Christ it does not make them immune from times when the time spent with another human being is desired- Loneliness is real to both men.
“IF…”
“IF“ the Bible is to be believed-
One is heading to Hell according to the Bible if he continues on his way. One is heading towards Eternity with Jesus Christ. Does the fact I say “If the Bible is to be believed” offend? Get your attention? Surely, “if you and I believed it” we wouldn’t’ Neglect these souls with such indifference in light of the fact Jesus Christ is worthy of their worship and He died for them? People enter into eternity of all ages. SOME are so busy pursuing life they seem not to HAVE TIME or MAKE TIME for God. Others are older craving some human companionship and the church- that is not a building but people like me-perhaps you- MAKE NO TIME- TAKE NO TIMES- SHARE NO TIME- With those who are closer to eternity- they know it- we know it. And does it make a difference how we SPEND TIME? We often are a sorry lot, aren’t we. Some TIME spend Evaluating the TIME God has given us and what we are SPENDING TIME on is a good thing to do. Perhaps we would all do well to reflect and TAKE TIME- MAKE TIME- SPEND TIME- with someone who would appreciate SOME Of YOUR TIME with them. For the TIME will come, when they will pass away, into eternity. And one thing is for sure- Your or I will have no more TIME with them.
Could I encourage you to TAKE TIME- MAKE TIME- SHARE TIME- with an elderly person. LOOK out for those who are alone. PRAY ASK GOD to give you favor with someone older and if you have an elderly family member- Don’t WASTE TIME- Now is the TIME to act and reach out to them. Your company means more to them than all the flowers they will never know about.
The ELDERLY are DISPENSABLE;
No it is not correct to say that- absolutely not- yet how many of us live it out-We live as though they are of no significance, an inconvenience. There are some tragic cases of illness for some elderly people and the care giving some family have to give as best as possible. These thoughts are not written for such who genuinely seek to care for loved ones as best as they can, as long as they can. I know of one such man who cared for his dear mom who recently died when she was in her early Nineties. He gave the best part of twenty years taking care of her until her last few months. My admiration for him is huge. I am told he “gave up his career” to take care of her. Is that possible for everyone- no…. He was a single man… but he found a way- for he valued a life…of an elderly person. To him his value on his mom’s life took precedent over his “career.” We often champion the athlete, wealthy, the educated, successful… this man unknown to many “championed” his mom’s cause. We are so , so misguided in many of the things we seek or deem as “Success.” Our values of possessions and praise-often takes precedence over what God values – PEOPLE!
You remember the story of when The LORD Jesus came to a place and a man was demonized and he cast them out into the pigs who ran over the cliff to destruction. The people on seeing this were not thrilled that a fellow human being who had lived in horror, fear, tortured was now free and liberated, no- they were furious because they placed more emphasis on profit, in this case, pigs, than on a person! We often do too! It may not be “pigs” but the things we value worthy of more than human beings, people who are made in the image of God and who now in some cases, sit alone, unwanted, undervalued and dispensable- the elderly!
We seek after things and praises, acknowledgements and things with such passion, and sacrifice and God demonstrated His passion and what He seeks after when He SACRIFICED His dear Son for the SOULS of people. How He valued the soul and worth of a person- the demoniac. Heavens values clashed with sinful human values. One chose pigs- the Other chose the welfare of a person!
SEGREGATION IN CHURCH;
I once was invited to spend five weeks in a country, at a church speaking three times on Sunday’s, two services back to back in the morning, followed by one in the evening. I began to notice, that the earliest service was mainly elderly people, who had their favorite type of music. This service was followed by a younger generation of families, singles with different music. As I began to think about it I wondered when or how did they ever meet- the two generations? What separated them- music? How was the working out of Titus chapter two in regards the older women training the younger women and the younger wife or mom learning of an older lady? Same with the men? It seemed to me- and I could be wrong- that the two groups seldom met. They had by choice segregated themselves and in doing so a vital ministry to one another was lost or missed! And could one reason be -because of music?
“LAST POST” MINISTRIES;
Once or twice a week for many years a friend went to a nursing home to visit elderly people. His motivation? Knowing that the only way some would leave there was in a box, sad but very true. He called it “THE LAST POST.” His service was not to a family member but to people he would befriend over time and he chose to Make time- Take time and Give time- to people for whom time was running out. Was he paid to do this? No! Was he with some “ministry” or organization? No! He simply had a concern for the souls of elderly people!
Every Monday night, in every season including the cold, wet, and damp evenings in Ireland, he would go and see these dear elderly people. He had taken a class where he was trained and could cut their toe nails for those who needed it. He would sit and play chess with some, but always with intent- their eternal well-being at heart! He had eternity in his heart and he looked at people with an eternal perspective. One can only believe God had placed this desire in his heart as He has a love and desire for the elderly. They looked forward to his coming, some perhaps would have no one come and visit them. Perhaps God will use you to further His Kingdom in the life or lives of some elderly people. Can you think of any who may benefit from a visit, a call, an invitation to come and have a cup of tea, coffee or a meal?
TAKE TIME- MAKE TIME- GIVE TIME…Someone needs you…Someone needs the Gospel of Christ. Someone else may need the Encouragement of Christ. Look at what you spend the time God has entrusted you with on. Consider the Elderly…Consider the lonely…Consider the souls of men… Consider the Value God places on an elderly person…Consider the CROSS… Consider the TIME You Have…and where necessary MAKE TIME- TAKE TIME- GIVE TIME… there is an elderly person who is in need. Perhaps God will use you to further His Kingdom in their lives…
Time is a Gift God entrusts to each of us…
The Elderly- MAKE TIME-TAKE TIME-GIVE TIME…while there is …TIME.