I Live With My Enemy.

It’s been many years since an elderly Godly man sat beside me and told me his story  and the pain he had known. His wife was not a follower of the Lamb of God as her life exhibited over years. From the world’s view he was quite successful, financially so. He had come from a good family and had good standing within the community. Externally looking good, what more could he want or need. But to the follower of the Lord Jesus externals are not enough. It is not possessions, prestige but people that matter. Their souls. To have a friendship based on a mutual relationship with God exclusively through the lovely LORD Jesus. You see he had no spiritual relationship with his wife for she was not a friend of the LORD Jesus. Religious? Yes. But no relationship with Him. Outwardly conforming but inwardly no transforming evidence of God alive in her life.

To put it  in words he could say “I Am Living With The Enemy!”

Jesus said, “Your enemies will be right in your own household!”- {Matt 10:36}.

Not without but within. The closest relationships, husband wife , parent child, at odds, a definite line drawn in the sand. The spiritually alive and the spiritually dead coinciding. Physically alive and perhaps many things in common but no spiritual realities to speak of, to delight,celebrate over. No active, vibrant prayer life. Prayer confined to saying “Grace” before a meal out of habit more than speaking and being truly thankful to God. Sadness of the lonesome walk without a loved one also entering in. The Bible, for some a decoration on the coffee table. Perhaps some giant size of a one laying there passed on from generation previously, but relegated now to a show piece and if mentioned a reference to a former family member from a generation or two previous but not of Him whom the Word refers to – {Read Luke 24:27}.


Because ones allegiance is to the Savior the other is to Self. One wants to follow the Savior the other wants Self’s way! They both are going in opposite directions, one going north the other south. Two different masters, one has self  and satan for master!-{Read 2 Tim 2;25-26}. The other is the Savior. One is submissive to the LORD, by the grace of God. The other is rebellious to the LORD. Living in a divided house because of different hearts. Painful.


Pray and ask Him for mercy, for He came to seek and save the lost and your partner, loved one falls into that category. Realize no amount of nagging can change their heart, for that is trying to achieve a spiritual goal by humanistic thinking- impossible! For only God can do the work of God by His Spirit.”The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you–they are full of the Spirit and life. “-{John 6:33}, Paul knew the pain of those who were “enemies of the cross.” It did not harden him against them but in Phil 3;18 we read and see his response, his heart towards them.”For many, of whom I have often told you and now tell you even with tears, walk as enemies of the cross of Christ.“-{Phil 3:18}. His heart of compassion for them expressed in his visible tears. You do not have to “work up” tears to prove you have compassion. At times it may be very hard but remember the goal, is His Glory,”…for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. “-{James 1:20}. What is right by Him and for Him is the goal. Anger cannot achieve that. And if you find yourself angry towards them, slipping into resentment towards them. What the situation is revealing is what is in your own heart and must immediately be repented of and putting on a heart of compassion, depending on Him to empower you and to live in love, by actively doing what He prefers

Love; To Love means “actively doing what the LORD prefers,” -{“Agapao-” “Helps Word study”}. Love is not left up to our interpretation but is defined by Him.- {Read 1 John 3:16… 1 Cor 13;4-7}.

Loving Your Enemies;

They are those who are actively opposed, openly hostile, driven by a deep seated hatred, implying irreconcilable hostility, coming out of a personal hatred bent on inflicting harm. It’s vicious. And sometimes the enemies are those closest to you.

In some cases the family member might be antagonistic towards you, or may be quiet, and give you the silent treatment seeking to manipulate you, but opposed to you either way. What can you do practically when you are around them. You can actively choose to love them. Don’t allow their evil to overcome you, but you overcome by following His prescription by doing good in return.

It’s sad to say that there are some people who will delight in your down fall, when you fail, sin, even in your own house but you are not responsible for them if they are in bondage to bitterness and hatred, only your response. If you are down get back up  His blood still cleanses from all unrighteousness and begin afresh with Him, loving Him and choosing to love others, even your enemies…who at times you live with…

“I live With My Enemy.”

Here is some ways you can live with them, actively doing what God prefers...

“But to those of you who will listen, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you,pray for those who mistreat you. ” -{Luke 6:27-28}

He gives 4 Commands.

He gives 4 ACTIVE words… to deliberately do good  to one’s enemies.

Love your enemies – Love that is committed to the highest good of the other person. The attitude that seeks the highest good of the sinner, and does acts of love. They are those who need to know the LORD, His forgiveness. Love them, thoughtfully, considerately, specifically, sacrificially, means denying yourself to prefer them, for Jesus sake! -{Read Phil 2:3-5; 2 Cor 4:5}. Jesus says in Matthew 5:43, “You have heard it said – ” which means this is the rabbinical tradition – “love your neighbor and hate your enemy,”  They were taught to HATE. Jesus is now saying I am going to have to teach you what is right. “Love your enemies.” DON’T HATE THEM! This would have been shocking to His hearers, but so much of what He said was and is shocking. But to those who have ears to hear Him and know HIM this is His Way. He gives the power they can do so because of the new life He imparts and they possess in Christ. {Read Phil 2:13; 4:19; 2 Peter 1:3-4}.

Do Good to them – actively seek that which is beneficial to them. The word “good,” is not superficial but what is inherently good. You are looking out for their best interests. What can you do to help show them the LORD and what would be of good for their eternal benefit. What ACTS of goodness can you show them. You are in their life and do good to them. Acts of goodness.

Bless them – Don’t return unkind speech with unkindness, but choose to do so with kindness, gracious speech, that builds up, not with rotten speech.  The word, “Bless,” means to speak well to them, praise them.-{Read Eph 4:29}. Because you are a new creature in Christ and have Divine power working in you, you can choose and do love them, do good to them and bless them with words that build up, speak well of them. This includes speaking about sin, judgement, Heaven and Hell, repentance, faith, forgiveness, eternal matters. Speak to them of the love of the LORD Jesus for them, His coming, His cross, His Blood, His resurrection, Grace, peace, Divine favor… and do it all in gentleness, not argumentative.-{Read 2 Tim 2:24-26}. It is present imperative which means this is to be the practice, habit of our life, speaking well, good of, praise them. What do you find in their life that you can commend? Commend them for it. “Speak well of those who speak ill of us.”

Pray for them –  Pray what is best for them, to know Him. One prayer you could pray is  “that God would grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will..”-{Read 2 Timothy 2:24-26}. You are appealing to God on their behalf, interceding for them before His Throne. Paul tells Timothy in regards prying for the lost, “I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings, be made on behalf of all men for kings and all who are in authority, … This is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.“- {1 Tim 2:1,3-4}. Praying for their soul, that God may have mercy and save them! Standing in the Gap for them.

He says they must love their enemies, do good and overcome evil and not be overcome by it, through actively doing good to them and for them. Speak blessings into their life, speak well not rotten, harsh, critical or ‘put down’ crude, unloving speech. Instead speak speech that builds them up, wholesome, uplifting truth in love.

The LORD Jesus felt and demonstrated love for us all. He acted towards us with deeds of goodness. He speaks graciously… He prays even now for us… and we can and must do likewise. 4 Short commands of how we are to THINK and TREAT others for Jesus sake… even our enemies. To the natural, lost person it’s impossible. To the believer it is not only possible it is commanded and He has given us the Spirit of God to empower us and His Word to guide, encourage us.

It is easy to withdraw into a shell because of their un-love and even feel sorry for yourself, trust the LORD to remind you of this verse and do it. And that He would give you His heart for them for unless they repent they will perish. “But GOD…” He sent His Son to save. One encouraging verse is “It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, among whom I am foremost of all.”-{1 Timothy 1:15}

You are not responsible for their attitudes, or actions, only for your own response. But in the hard place you have the power to love them and you have His precious and magnificent promises to strengthen, guide you in being His light in their spiritually darkened place. – {Read 2 Peter 1:3-4}.

It is interesting it does not say what we are NOT to do but as His people but actively what we are to do for them. Seeking their highest good. It’s not about avoiding them but actively doing good to them and for them. Only God can change a person. 

How Do You Live with the “enemy?”

The one who treats you as though you are the enemy?

You can say to yourself, and SHOW how,”I am living with the enemy by choosing to love, do good, bless, pray for them!” Now you are actively doing what the LORD prefers. It is not a matter of feelings but of choice! One choice at a time. Thinking His Word, depending on His Spirit and showing forth the mind and love of Christ.

Remember they are as you once were, spiritually bound, blind, “But God…” as He intervened in Paul’s life. -{Acts 9}; and countless others including yours He can do likewise in the life of your loved one.

Keep choosing to love by choosing to do what He prefers as found in his Word…Well done, your light is shining by your good works and others will see it and glorify your Father in Heaven,-{ Read -Matt 5:16}. We can but fall back on His mercy and His desire who came to seek and save the lost, including your loved one. But you keep loving obeying His Word and as you do, you are loving Him. For He said, “He who has My commandments and keeps them is who LOVES ME.”-{John 14:21}.


Hide Luke 6:27-28 in your heart. Write it out carry with you for the next month and when you have time read it, word for word, phrase for phrase and before you know it if you read it every morning or evening you will have read approx 60 times, and you will have memorized it and the Holy Spirit can bring back to your remembrance so you can apply it and in doing so express love to GOD and Honor Him and help the individual. Also you can use to share with others to encourage them to love Him and others.

Perhaps place on your bathroom mirror and each morning or evening  read it and before you will know it you will have memorized and can apply to your life in your situation.

“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” –

“Our enemies are those who purposefully and knowingly seek our ill-will. They have bitterness and hatered in their hearts against us. They do not seek our good, but only what is evil. It is these people we are to love.”-

“Treat others the same way you want them to treat you.”- {Luke 6;31}

And by God’s grace and mercy, the enemy of the cross, becomes a worshiper of Him who hung there for them too and may you see them grow to know Him better and better and love Him supremely and enjoy sweet times around Him in conversation, prayer with the same goals, eternal goals and realities.

And so keep loving… How? by doing  good… blessing… and praying for them!

“He who honors Me I will honor!”